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poems Thoughts

swallowed up in sadness

I wanna cry, I wanna shout, 
Run around and scream.  
I open my mouth, but no sound comes out— 
Just these feelings, frightful and mean.

Just myself that scares me, 
I don’t know what it is.  
I want others to understand and see, 
But they’re drowning in their bliss.  

There’s a bag of stones in my heart, 
Makes me wonder how it came. 
Makes me pick up the shard  
On the floor, and let it go, all the same.  

I wonder if the accident that came a day ago 
Could me be in the white car? 
Maybe in a week or so 
I will escape to darkness far.  

I get up, only to fall down again, 
Then drop wordlessly on the floor.  
I just want to see my friends 
And run outside, past the door. 

Here I am trapped in a box 
With a heavy feeling in my heart 
Eventually, I tear at the locks 
Of my hair, and wish it didn’t start.  

Why did this ever begin? 
When will it end? 
Why is my life suddenly thrown in a bin, 
And my heart distorted and bent?

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When emotions take over you, it’s overwhelming.

Especially when they tell you to give up on the things you’d normally agree to and work hard for.

So many questions.

So little answers.

It’s just life.

Like our ancestors, we must move forward to where we want to be. For the people coming after us, so they can stand on our shoulders and grow.