sunlight comes in through an old window,
sparrows sing in the mango trees outside.
although it is a bright day, it’s dark for me-
with unexplainable feelings deep inside.
drawers are open, walls are bare.
summer breeze is hot, secrets float in.
i cry myself to sleep, who cares?
no one, really- they do not know.
drawings and drafts are torn to pieces,
thrown carelessly on the dirty floor.
last night there was love, laughter, and kisses,
but all of that i left behind.
the bed is messy, pillow wet with tears
it still smells of you, sweet and warm.
i have too many secrets, and still more fears
for today and tomorrow, and what is to come.
make a wish
at the lunar eclipse.
you will never know
what awaits in the future.
make a wish
at falling stars.
no matter where you are,
you are always more than what you think.
make a wish
if you can, everyday.
maybe you’ll see the people you miss
and say more things you wanted to say.
I look at them longingly, just after the fight ebbs away.
I look at them again, after a long day.
I look at them longingly, with so much love in my eyes,
But then there’s the enemy, playing as friends in disguise.
I look at them lovingly, just after a long week
After so many days, I take just one peek.
I look at them lovingly, with the saddest smile on my face
Like a girl who ended up in the wrong time and place.
I look at them sadly, not being able to join in
Not being able to tell them what’s within.
I look at them sadly, with a small light of happiness in my eyes
And I look at them, staring, thinking of this world, a lie.
I look at them longingly, only being able to watch.
I look at them longingly; I miss them so much.
I look at them sadly, hearing their shouts in play.
I look at them lovingly, if only they could hear what I say.
Glassy waters glisten like silver
The air is cold and makes me shiver
The bonfire crackle at night sings me to sleep
While my sister and I cuddle in the soft sheets.
First time we’re going out for fun
First time being able to run
In the cold air, free as the wild horses
While the canoes on the lake begin their courses.
The tent shakes and seems like it’s shivering in the rain.
I think of hiking on a trail, a terrain.
It is a little strange to think that other people are at home
While the four of us— around the island we roam.
My jacket wraps around me as I struggle to get to the tent
I think of all the things and places we went.
I feel so lucky, so awed by the view
Of the glassy lake, beckoning us to begin our life anew.
Life used to be a world of wonder
A world of mystery, of love and light.
But our dreams have been knocked asunder
And the birds have fallen after their first flight.
I’m scared to feel pain, yet I long for it.
I’m scared to stand up, for fear of falling.
I’m scared to light the candle, for it won’t stay lit.
And I’m scared to answer when the voice is calling.
coffee fills the air outside
breakfast dishes and sunlight
furry being gonna hide
quiet mind where hurts abide
soft pillow wet with tears
blank features yet so many fears
everything distant seems far away
moonlight outshone the day
this silence is not the same one i used to hear
the air is hung with so many tears
pretty creature please dont go
where there was summer there is snow
pretty creature dont go away
where there was night there is day
please dont leave
please dont leave
please dont leave me here
white dress stained with chocolate
i dont wanna cry yet
everything reminds me of you
can lies be really true?
flowers wilting by the windowsill
daffodils grow by the water mill
its all so blindingly bright
this new sunlight
pretty creature please dont go
where there was summer there is snow
pretty creature dont go away
where there was night there is day
please dont leave
please dont leave
please dont leave me here
gone, gone with the wind
love, love’s all pretend
gone, gone so fast
nothing ever lasts
pretty creature, is love real
pretty creature, do you feel
pretty creature will you go
just like the melting snow?
stand at the zenith and burn
into ashes, placed in an urn.
stand at the pole and freeze
there were never such beautiful eyes as these.
I once had a music box, a music box without sound.
Not one note it had, for its gears were rusted round.
Some told me it was worthless, and that it was a waste of time,
But I believe it’s special, more special than my rhymes.
The music box’s key was lost somewhere
Because it was moved from here to there.
It came from a land far, far away
Where the sun’s rays touched the sea all day.
The music box was a gift on a special day
When couples gathered; on the grass they lay.
It once played soft music through the summer air
But now the music faded from wear.
Rain and sun, and rain again
Was the fate of this faithful friend
And soon it was passed on to my hands
The music box with the beauty of all lands.
Alas, the rust took all of its shine
The shine worn down by cunning time.
The silent music I had always heard
While behind me sang the birds.
Though I had never heard its sweet melody
I am very sure that it was lovely.
But now, though I hear its silent singing,
It leads me to white dresses and bells ringing.
For the silent music there was no cure
To revive its music, beautiful and pure.
But now, I hold it as a gift of love,
Whose giver is now in heaven above.
Hello everyone! It’s been such a long time.
Anyway, this poem’s first lines came into my head when my sister did some poking around in my stuff, most imporantly the special jewelry chest that was given to me by my grandmother.
This jewelry case has one cabinet on the right, and four drawers on the left. It is maroon-colored, and on the bottom there is a note. This note came from my late grandfather, given to my grandmother on Valentine’s Day.
On the 21st of April, just a few days ago, it was my grandfather’s fifth anniversary.
This jewelry chest had a small music box that I discovered last year, at around November. When I took the compartment apart (being some bored idiot), I found that it didn’t work. It was all rusty, and covered in cobwebs. Then, because I was in a thoughtful mood that day, I decided to think about that day when it was given to my grandmother. As nearly all my ideas turn into a story, song, or poem, I wrote my ideas down and it turned into this.
I will publish a series of number-titled poems soon! I missed this blog so much!
I told myself so many times not to touch the light For fear of losing what I had with me But when I approached the flame, bright I finally saw what I wanted to see. All my memories faded into the white light All those unforgettable tales and fights They were all gone, and all that was left was you And I thought, “Where is this going to?” I told myself not to tell all the things I wanted to say Because I was scared and I didn’t want to see who I thought I was But, as a thought came to me, I told them anyway And out came the real me, without any fuss. All my emotions flowed out as words Words untold for so many years They flew out of me as birds, Birds in the form of my unshed tears. I used to tell myself I couldn’t be myself in front of them And that I couldn’t do it anyway. But here I am, laughing again, Saying all the things I wanted to say. ˆˆˆˆˆˆˆˆˆˆˆˆˆˆ
Here’s what I have to say.
Be yourselves, even if people don’t accept you. You have to accept yourself for others to accept you.
Love yourself. It’s better to be hated for who you are, than to be hated for who you pretend to be.
Love yourself and everone around you, like what Jesus did to his persecutors.
Thanks for the inspiration @fayannswearing !
Some people think that flying high is easy. Some think it feels so nice because it’s bright. But once you get to the top, you’ll get wheezy, Because in front of you’s a shadow and not the light. It keeps growing with every step I take, It keeps showing in every song I make. Nothing really helps, I’m hopeless when it comes to me, So I can’t really understand why you chose me. How can I know you when I don’t know myself? Why do want me and not someone else? I can’t even be who I would’ve wanted to be So why is it me you always want to see? Some people think climbing mountains is easy- So cold, yet so warm, and just so bright. But once you get to the top, you’ll get wheezy Because in front of you’s a shadow and not the light. It keeps growing with every step I take, It keeps showing in every song I make. Nothing really helps, I’m hopeless when it comes to me, So I can’t really understand why you chose me. How can I know you when I don’t know myself? Why do want me and not someone else? I can’t even be who I would’ve wanted to be, So why is it me you always want to see? I can’t understand I can’t control it I can barely stand And I just don’t fit How can I know you when I don’t know myself? Why do want me and not someone else? I can’t even be who I would’ve wanted to be So why is it me you always want to see? ˚ ˚ ˚ ˚ ˚ ˚ ˚ ˚ ˚ ˚ ˚ ˚ ˚ ˚ ˚ ˚ ˚ ˚ ˚
Hello everyone! I haven’t posted for two months, so it’s really nice to be back. (This is a little strange. What a happy greeting when this song’s so sad.)
This song is about sadness. You out there, anyone, you might know how that feels. Everyday, that heavy feeling grows.
But for all that I know, there is something that makes us happy. Whether it’s the music we listen to, the flowers outside our windows, or the traffic jam that never happened.
And for all I know, something that will make all of us happy, is the end of the pandemic. I’m pretty sure that it will end, and it’s something that we should all look forward to everyday. We all need something to look forward to.
Dear my friend, how are you now? Remember those days we got into trouble together, got scolded together? My old friend, where are you now? Remember those days we used to play Hide and seek under the moonlit sky? My old friend, I’m fine here, I’ve got so much to tell you, All about my life and wanderings, All my written works and songs. I miss you, my dear friend, I hope you’re fine. I hope you aren’t alone and sad. My old friend, something happened today: A fight, then I came home wounded and hurt. My old friend, I hope the same doesn’t happen to you. Do you remember the arguments, the hurts and pains we had together? My old friend, I miss you so much. My old friend, snow’s falling on my world. Why does it have to be so sad? Why did you have to go there, where I couldn’t find you? My old friend, the cold rain is soaking me, dripping through my lonely form on the road. I miss you my dear friend, I wish you were here with me, telling me about your day. My old friend, I hope you aren’t six feet under the ground, where it is all loneliness and desolation. I hope you’re happy with your life there, enjoying yourself and possibly other acquaintances. My dear friend, goodbye, I have to go now. My dear friend, goodnight.
One afternoon in September last year, I sat by the window and two songs came into my head: Dear my friend by Agust D, and My Old Friend by Unique Salonga.
This pandemic makes one miss so many friends and family, no?
I remembered how life used to be before COVID-19, carefree and happy. Then, a few days after writing this up, I saw a window in the distance, with no lights for several days now. Then came that feeling: is the person living there okay? There was also that thought that one is always continuously terrified of: “What if my friends or family- Are they okay-?
Then I video-called the two group chats I was in. Thank God everything and everyone was alright!
I wanna cry, I wanna shout, Run around and scream. I open my mouth, but no sound comes out— Just these feelings, frightful and mean. Just myself that scares me, I don’t know what it is. I want others to understand and see, But they’re drowning in their bliss. There’s a bag of stones in my heart, Makes me wonder how it came. Makes me pick up the shard On the floor, and let it go, all the same. I wonder if the accident that came a day ago Could me be in the white car? Maybe in a week or so I will escape to darkness far. I get up, only to fall down again, Then drop wordlessly on the floor. I just want to see my friends And run outside, past the door. Here I am trapped in a box With a heavy feeling in my heart Eventually, I tear at the locks Of my hair, and wish it didn’t start. Why did this ever begin? When will it end? Why is my life suddenly thrown in a bin, And my heart distorted and bent?
When emotions take over you, it’s overwhelming.
Especially when they tell you to give up on the things you’d normally agree to and work hard for.
So many questions.
So little answers.
It’s just life.
Like our ancestors, we must move forward to where we want to be. For the people coming after us, so they can stand on our shoulders and grow.
You’re a puzzle I need to solve, You’re a lock and I am the key. You are the sun and I revolve Around you, can’t you see? You’re achievement I need to unlock, You’re the brightest star in the night. You’re the waves that make my ship rock, You are wind that moves out of sight. And you have become one part of me Part of my life, part of my soul And you help me through times when troubles unfold. You are the wonderful rose that blooms, You’re the clouds that float over me. You are the the cornerstone of the room, You are the blue that lingers in sea. You are the moon that glows in the night, You are the sun that shines through the rain. You are the lamp that keeps away fright, You are the person who drives me insane. You have been with me all of my life, You have seen me laugh and cry. You have embraced me, though I was selfish You have stayed with me through strife. You are my world You are something wonderful You are italic and bold You are the wind that keeps me cool. So thank you, for all you have done. Thank you for joining me in battles where we have won. And you have become one part of me Part of my life, part of my soul And you help me through times when troubles unfold.
My parents and my sister have been with me all my life, and stuck with me through everything. This is also something for anyone out there who needs cheering up, and most importantly, to my mom, dad, and my sister. This poem is barely one-millionth of all the words to describe all those loving family members you have out there. Whoever you are, wherever you are, go give your family an “I love you,” and a “Thank you!”
The sun sets and sinks below the sea’s rim, Hissing and boiling, perhaps it cools within The ocean’s waters, embracing the sun as a friend, And at last, for us, the day finally ends. The sun will sink, and rise again in the morning, When we are all awake and done snoring. The birds will be singing in the morning sky And slowly, without us noticing, time passes by. Breakfast, lunch, and dinner passes with glee. Mother calls, “It’s time to sleep!” The sun has sunk into the sea once more, And in the moonlight, the birds’ throats are sore From singing all day, from dusk till dawn But now we must sleep, like a deer to it’s fawn. In the morning, we get up again, We hurry next door to see our friends. We talk of school and days long since gone And we write much, paper rises to a ton. Jokes we tell under the late afternoon sky, One, two times, we hear a baby cry. “Let’s go to the shore, to see the sunset! And I’ll reach the our wonderful sea first, I bet!”
Hello everyone! I haven’t written a poem about New Year, but I want to share something I want to remind myself about with you, hoping that it might help.
“There are two sides to yourself, and they are just there, unnoticed.
One is who you are right now, and the other is who you will be.“
Happy New Year everyone! Let’s all hope 2021 will be a better year for everyone around the world.
Sweet little things that I think of Specially at night Makes me dream and takes my mind off The sadness and fright Of the dark. Night envelopes the lamp’s light Making it a beautiful sight. But as I lay here, my friend, I think of you. Morning comes, I yawn and see the birds outside, Living, flying so free. Sometimes, though, I want to hide, Because I am all alone, with nothing to see. The day passes quickly, with me, thinking of you, my friend Then the morning and afternoon cames to end, And I lay awake once more in bed. I see the dark night Enveloping the lamp’s light Making it a beautiful sight. But as I lay here, my friend, I think of you. Staying here inside makes it so hard to think of The grass under my feet, Makes life hard without you to talk to all day, Back then, when I had more to say. The daylight and the moonlight Guides me through my life, At least, my life stuck here. Dark night, Lamp light, The fright is gone I think of you.
Brush strokes, forming a painting, Drops of water in a pond. Little bells on the door, jingling, To greet our visitors fond. Yule-tide is coming, the tree is up, The smell of baked cookies wafting through the air. I relax in a corner with a cup Of hot chocolate, and wonder why the rain’s still there. In other countries, snow is falling, Graceful skaters are scanning the frozen lake. But here the rain falls into streams with a ping, And the weather could be sunny, give or take. There are people making the parol, And fill the busy streets with the star lights, Engines buzz and tires all roll, Making their way through the Christmas night. Santa Claus will come, I’m sure, With his bag of presents through the rain Though not a quite as he came before, I know he will come again. I write busily in a corner, letters to ever so many people Who might be on their way. Outside, the bells ring, and I look out to see the church steeple, And dress up for Christmas Day.
Hush! A little girl of twelve is curled by the window, Pondering her day. She thinks about running away, when she’s fifteen or so, Because, for her, there’s no other way Of escaping from the clouds covering her world of darkness, Or to banish the weights of sadness That they unknowingly put on her aching head. Slowly, as she thinks, she crawls to the bed. “Dear me!” she exclaims, as a thought comes to her. “I shall go to a world of writers, where the sophisticated wear hats of real fur!” She pulls the blanket over her head, to shield herself from the cold air, Then turns to her dear teddy, quite old with wear. “Someday, Pooh, we’ll both run off to someplace, Where there are people who don’t think I’m a waste of space. Where there are unlimited pens and ink, And hundereds— maybe thousands— of places we can think.” The rain falls outside her window pane, glistening in the late afternoon light, And she falls asleep, the teddy in her warm embrace. She is still mumbling in her sleep, “Tomorrow, escape I might, To a world of pen and paper.”
The two sides of me suddenly show themselves, Along with my past and present. I have to deal with the pain, the guilt, of not being able to tell a sweet secret, One that also has a bitter side to my story. The brightly colored boxes show themselves, and I unwillingly ignore them, Knowing that on the other side someone is waiting For me to stay. Hearts on a single side, and bitterness in the honey. Gray and violet, side by side, emerge in the dark abyss of my mind. To think that I have been waiting for something that will never happen, That I had wasted an entire year of my life On something I’d never get. Vibrant violet and lonely gray, all in one person. Rain falls nearly everyday, thundering through the lonely streets in my head. Outside, I don’t know it’s sunny— all I know is violet and gray. There is a key I can’t find, a puzzle I can’t solve. A feeling I can’t seem to hide, so that it appears in everything I write. Compared to last year, my world seems so heavier, like the flame in me disappeared. Instead, there’s cold water raining down on me day by day, And the feeling, begging me to let it out of it’s prison cell. Once I was violet, the last of all the colors, yet the brightest in my life. But now I’m gray, gray as the clouds covering the sun. So many layers of feelings in this heart, so many that it makes it heavy. I can’t seem to carry all of this— I feel as though it’s dragging me to the earth. I just want to be happier, but why doesn’t my heart hear anything I say? Others see I’m happy, but I’m the opposite. So many “why’s” in this maze of thoughts, So many lies in different places. I want to be happy, please, just for once in my life. Someone help me, I’m falling slowly in the pool of cold rain. I’ve become vibrant violet and lonely gray, all in one person, And rain falls nearly everyday, thundering through the lonely streets in my head.
Trees swaying in the meadow, Birds flying in the air, The mesmerizing sound of the crow Come into the forest, it’s beautiful there. Tall grass swaying in the breeze, Minnows swimming in the pond, There’re no areas as wonderful as these, For they form with you a strong bond. The little critters crawling on the ground, The butterflies flying over flowers. Here what is lost can be found, But it will take some hours. Come and canoe in the river, See the fishes below. I came here once with my sister, And she helped me row. There might be fairies here If you know where to look. Maybe they are far or near, Or perhaps near the brook. Let’s all walk in the forest, And see what we can find. We can laugh, dance, and jest, So come now, let’s leave the city behind!
Wake up, found myself on the floor Slowly walk out the door New books’re coming, I’m sure Later, perhaps I’ll read some more. But the drama in the novel can’t distract me Instead of knights and queens, it’s you I see. I had resolved to just move on To never think of you at the break of dawn. But how come your voice is still in my head? How come it’s not the adventure story instead? There’s always a tiny hint of worry When it rains: “Hey, go home and hurry.” There is a strange feeling, a touch I miss And even stranger, your gentle kiss. “Get out!” I’d have said to the voice in my mind. “Go away, or I’ll peel you off lile a rind!” Just leave, I don’t want you anyway. But somehow, I need you, and the little voice stays. I absentmindedly turn the yellowing pages, Not minding the tales of damsels and sages, And look out of the white-paned window To see the trees, with branches swaying low. There, in the free wind, an empty swing just rocks. Where you once gave me a heart-shaped box Full of sweets and sugarcanes, Then realizing my gaze, I look away from the pane. This is what I am right now: distracted. Why do I still think of you in my head? There, once again, is the heavy feeling in my heart That I used to feel when we were apart. How is it, that I lost control? Why’s this feeling digging me up like a mole? I’ll just try to forget you, even if I can’t Your eyes, your music, your smile and your scent. So in the end, I just close my eyes, Thinking of the time that went by.
[verse] I’m lying down, restless at midnight. Can’t seem to get my eyes to close. I see the yellow lamplight, Its radiance dancing like a rose. [pre-chorus] Mmm mmm mmm, how do you get to sleep If your head’s too full of thoughts? Mmm mmm mmm, do you lie in bed and count sheep? Or all the things you lost? [chorus] I am lying awake, thinking of the world outside. I want to run away, but there’s no place to hide. I want to go out and run and shout. But I’m trapped here, and it’s my tomorrow I’m thinking about. [verse] In the dark, I see the inkblots on my fingers Reminds me of the days when I wrote till dawn. I try to get my mind off outside, but its still lingers Up till now, I want to run free, free as a fawn [pre-chorus] Mmm mmm mmm, how do you get to sleep If your head’s too full of thoughts? Mmm mmm mmm, do you lie in bed and count sheep? Or all the things you lost? [chorus] I am lying awake, thinking of the world outside. I wasnt to run away, but theres no place to hide. I want to go out and run and shout. But I’m trapped here, and it’s my tomorrow I’m thinking about. [bridge] Will we stay here forever? When will we all be together? When will be able to feel the grass under our toes? When will we see again our friends and our foes? [chorus] I am lying awake, thinking of the world outside. I want to run away, but theres no place to hide. I want to go out and run and shout. But I’m trapped here, and it’s my tomorrow I’m thinking about. [outro] I remember, I remember (Running outside, yeah) I remember, I remember (When we didnt have to hide inside) [slowly fade out....]
I feel like a lost star Zooming through space and time, Can’t seem to find What I lack in myself. I see, vividly lost stars Searching for their shine. Looking up at the sky, Gazing at the planets above The beautiful heavens, Crafted with utmost detail. I feel hopeless, colorless Nothing but bleakness. I feel lonely, A solitary person in a world full of people. I am one of those lost stars, Searching endlessly Through the darkest nights Never caring to stop. I feel like a lost star, Zooming through space and time Can’t seem to find What I lack in myself. Gazing through telescopes Big and small Watching, waiting for a light One that shines brighter that most. Looking, searching For a speck of bright gold Placed on the velvet blackness Of the dome surrounding me. I feel hopeless, colorless Nothing but bleakness I feel lonely, A solitary person in a world full of people. I am one of those lost stars Searching endlessly Through the darkest nights Never caring to stop. I feel like a lost star Zooming through space and time Can’t seem to find What I lack in myself.